Lies. We all know that it is wrong to lie, and yet, we allow ourselves to be lied to. Why is this? I’m sure it’s in our nature as women to want to please others. When we do this, we begin to believe what other people say to us and about us, and pretty soon, those lies become our truth.
We understand that this is a very sensitive and personal subject. This was extremely difficult for both of us to write about, and caused us to do some deep soul searching, but we feel strongly that this is an area that must be covered in depth.
For this reason we will be discussing The Lies We Believe over a 3-week period. This week we will transparently reveal to you the lies we believe. Next week we will discuss several lies that many women allow themselves to believe. The final week of this topic will be on ways to recognize and battle the lie.
Please stick with us as we delve into a very serious and unfortunately common issue that plagues most women. We understand that this is very private, and are not expecting you to spew out your lies for everyone to read, even if you respond anonymously, however, if you do feel compelled to comment, we would treasure your thoughts.
There are the obvious lies that unfortunately begin at a very young age on the playground or sadly to say for some at home. Through age, maturity in my relationship with God and a loving husband I have overcome believing those lies to be truth.
Unfortunately, there is still one lie that I struggle with in my life. I have believed this lie since childhood and it has become ingrained into my character. Like a wolf in sheep’s clothing it actually looks and feels like truth but when I force myself to look in the mirror the sheep’s clothing comes off and the wolf is glaring at me. I don’t like it. The lie I am referring to is that in order to be accepted, liked and loved by others every action I take, every word I say and how I choose to live my life must have the approval of those around me, whether it be family, friends or mere acquaintances. It has been easy to say to myself that the only approval I need is Gods and that as long as I follow his voice all will be good, however, when faced with certain situations along the way I have cowered back into submitting to believing the lie as truth and seeking “approval of” and at times “praise for” my actions. I have made unnecessary apologies. I have changed plans to accommodate what someone else wanted instead of what was best for my family and me. The list goes on.
I have come to realize that in believing this lie as truth I have… 1) Spent a large majority of my time with hurt feelings over how someone else responded or did not respond to me. 2) On more than one occasion caused my husband and children to feel like that their feelings were second place to others. My heart breaks at this realization because I love them with such intensity. They have given me their best and they deserve to have my best. 3) Made too many decisions based on the question “What will others think of or say about me?” 4) Robbed myself of even greater things that God wants to do in my life.
After many years I am finally confronting this lie and seeking Gods help for I know I cannot do this on my own. I believe that when I get through this particular journey that I will be a better person for it and hopefully an even better example of God’s grace to others.
There are several lies that I believe about myself at different times, but I believe they all stem from this giant lie: “I am not enough.” When did I start believing this lie? Who knows? However, I can look back at several events in my life and note that I was believing this lie at that time.
This lie warps itself, depending on my current situation. At times I believe I’m not pretty enough, or sometimes I’m not good enough. Maybe I’m not talented enough, or smart enough. Often times I feel as though I’ve conquered one of these lies, when all of a sudden, another one creeps in to take the other’s place.
Currently I’m battling this lie. I have felt a calling in my heart to do something that God wants me to do, and yet, rather than believing God that I am ready and able to do what He has in store for me, I am choosing to believe that I am too young and am not truly capable to do this. I know in my head who to believe, but my heart will not follow suit.
Lies, regardless of their origination, are ugly. And, unfortunately, once we allow ourselves to believe the lie, it seems as though it is almost impossible to train our hearts otherwise. We become almost dependent on the lie to function throughout our lives. We question the truth and never question the lie.
What am I going to do, you may wonder? I honestly don’t know. I pray that I will get to the place where I can put this lie to bed and move on in God’s will, but I’m not there yet.
Like Donna said earlier, our lies don’t just hurt us, they often times hurt the ones we love as well. Be aware of what you let into your heart, and ask the Lord to reveal His truths to you through His eyes.
